Shingeki No Messaging
by Hunter Ark
Summary: Our favorite characters, love to message each other? Join our heroes in this story of Messages, friendship, love, and smashing Jean's face into a keyboard. (Uke! Levi btw)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: What's up Fuckers! I HAVEN'T HAD ANY THOUGHTS FOR ''Let's go ghost hunting it'll be fun." LATELY. SOOOOO, I was looking around and I couldn't find any Shingeki no Kyojin chatroom fics, and mine right here is just pure crack, ENJOY.**

**Eren: VengeanceJaeger**

**Mikasa: Ackerwoman**

**Armin: Smartysmartz**

**Jean: Jeantehhorsie**

**Sasha: Potatoes4prez**

**Marco: Halfman (Cries because I'm an awful human being)**

**Bertoldt: Bertibooo**

**Reiner: Reinerdeer**

**Levi: Windex4lyf**

**And that's it for this chapter, so sit back, don't put any liquids in your mouth, and don't choke. HERE WE GOOOOOOO!**

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_**VegeanceJaeger has signed on.**_

**VengeanceJaeger: **Anyone wanna tell me why my chocolate is gone?

**Smartysmartz: **I believe you'll want to talk to Jean about that, I'm working on a puzzle at the moment.

**VengeanceJaeger: **FUCKING HORSEFACE, I'M COMING THE FUCK AFTER YOU, WHERE'S MY WOODEN SPOON?

**Jeantehhorsie: **Good luck Jaeger, I fucking doubt that you'll find me in my SUPER SECRET ASDFGHJNVHBSVBEBGUYHERBBEEEYRRUFEHUCJBHISBFSBFREBGVEBGBRYEGYEGYYWGYGRYEGYEGYYERGRUSGYUE37EEH7T73HHU

**Bertibooo: **Jean wtf?

**Reinerdeer: **I thing Eren found Jean's ''sUPER SECRET" hiding spot.

**Halfman: **He's probs smashing Jean's face into his keyboard.

**Ackerwoman: ***tear* JUST LIKE I TAUGHT HIM. THEY GROW UP SO FAST.

**VengeanceJaeger: **THAT'S WHAT YOU GET BITCH.

**Jeantehhorsie: **WHATEVER, IMMA DRAW A DICK ON YOUR FACE WHILE YOU'RE SLEEPING.

**Windex4lyf: **Don't you fucking touch my Titan, horseboy.

**Jeantehhorsie:** Screw you shorty!

**Vengeancejaeger: **WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY ABOUT HEICHOU?

**Jeantehhorsie: **YOU HEARD ME! I SAISDN BSRHYGFUESBVGHSEYIGGFGUUYFGYWGYGVFVBVVGDHGGYFYERIOAYFGEYUGYYGGFRYEG

**Smartysmartz: **LEVI STOP! HE HAS 9 KEYS STUCK TO HIS CHEEKS!

**Windex4lyf: **IT'S NOT ENOUGH.

**Potatoes4prez: **I'M LAUGHING SO HARD RIGHT NOW, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW!

**Bertibooo: **Reiner, remind me why your screenname is reinerdeer?

**Reinerdeer: **Because, I help Santa pull his sleigh every year dumbass.

**Ackerwomen: ***post pic of a reindeer with Reiner's face.* Ho ho ho motherfuckers.

**Reinerdeer: **YOU DELETE THAT RIGHT NOW OR I WILL.

**Ackerwoman: ** I DARE YOU. EVEN TRY AND TOUCH MY LAPTOP.

**Smartysmartz: **Anyone else noticed? WHERE'S EREN?

**VengeanceJaeger: **ALL OF JEAN'S KEY POPPED OUT. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

**Halfman: **Eren, it's probably not even that funny.

**VengeanceJaeger: ***post pic of jeans face, which is full of computer key shaped marks*

**Halfman:** nvm

**Potatoes4prez: **I'M GONNA BLOW THIS UP AND PUT IT IN THE BARRACKS.

_**Jeantehhorsie has signed out.**_

**Windex4lyf: **Serves him right, no one touches my boo.

**VengeanceJaeger: **OH MR. HEICHOU~ *swoon*

**Smartysmartz: **YOU 2 ARE SO GROSS!

_**Smartysmartz has signed out.**_

**Bertibooo: I **better leave too, it's getting late.

**Reinerdeer: **snooze time.

_**Bertibooo and Reinerdeer have signed out**_

_**Potatoes4prez has signed out**_

_**Ackerwoman has signed out.**_

**Halfman: **GOODNIGHT GUYS!

_**Halfman has signed out.**_

**Windex4lyf: **Soooo…..Eren.

**VengeanceJaeger: ** Your room, I'll be there in 5 minutes ;)

**Windex4lyf: ***Post pic of "My body is ready" meme*

**VengeanceJaeger: **sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.

_**VengeanceJaeger and Windex4lyf have signed out.**_

**A/N: I WILL CONTINUE THIS STORY JUST SO YOU KNOW. It is probably awful but, I hope you guys like the first chapter, BECAUSE IT IS ONLY THE BEGINNING.**

**So, until the next expedition, **

**BAIII**

**-Ark**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: What's up Fuckers! HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIT. This fic is already at 700 views? I feel so honored, *tear tear* BUT ANYWHORE, HERE'S CHAPTER 2**

**GET READY FOR SOME MUTHA FUCKIN ERERI BITCHES.**

**DISCLAIMER: YOU STUPID FUCK, I DON'T OWN SHINGEKI NO KYOJIN, ARE YOU FUCKIN STUPID?**

_**VengeanceJaeger has signed on.**_

**Windex4lyf: **EREEEEEEEEEEEEEN, My stomach hurts x(

**VengeanceJaeger: **Oh noooooo. Is it bad pains?

**Windex4lyf: **IT FEELS LIKE ORPHANS ARE RIPPING OUT MY GUTS AND USING THEM TO DECORATE CHRISTMAS TREES.

**Windex4lyf: **aaaaand I just puked. Great, now there's a puddle of vomit on my floor.

**Jeantehhorsie: **I ain't cleanin that up xP

**Smartysmartz: **I do not even want to know the horrors that Levi has expelled.

**Reinerdeer: **That's Armin speak for I'm not going near that shit.

**Bertibooo: **Pass

**Ackerwoman: **No thank you.

**Halfman: **I won't take that up either.

**VengeanceJaeger: **Fine, I'll clean it up! I hate all of you.

**Windex4lyf: **Thanks, brat. I really want a cheeseburger.

**Windex4lyf: **Dipped in chocolate.

**VegeanceJaeger: **Heichou, are you feeling okay?

**Windex4lyf: **Why would you ask me that? I'm fine! WHY? DO I NOT SEEM OKAY?

**Jeantehhorsie: **JFC Levi, pull that tampon out of your ass and relax would ya?

Windex4lyf: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME? I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT THE ONLY THING IN MY ASS IS EREN YOU STUPID FUCK AND, I AM A MAN, I DON'T USE TAMPONS. I'M GONNA HUNT YOU DOWN AND SHOVE MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS YOU'LL TASTE MY BOOTS.

**Jeantehhorsie**: Levi, are you bleeding, by any chance? Because I think you might be on your man period.

**Windex4lyf**: What are you talking about?

**Reinerdeer**: Armin, use the knowledge of your blondness to explain this to the Corporal.

**Smartysmartz**: Well, Rivaille, it seems as though you're experiencing symptoms of the female menstrual cycle. Symptoms such as cravings, nausea, mood swings, and cramps.

**Halfman**: But doesn't Levi always get mood swings?

**Windex4lyf**: You shut your whore mouth, Freckles.

**Ackerwoman**: I can vouch for those btw. Those cramps are the uterus that you don't have ripping itself into pieces.

**Bertiboo**: ewwwwwwwwwww, I think I'm gonna vomit now.

**Reinerdeer**: NOT IN THIS BED YOUR NOT.

**Smartysmartz**: Awww, you 2 are sharing a bed now? CUTEY CUTE.

**Jeantehhorsie**: Did Levi go on some sort of magical adventure to find his stupid fucking cheeseburger?

**Windex4lyf**: Nope, just staring at Eren's ass as he mops up my floor.

**VengeanceJaeger**: STAHP IT.

**Windex4lyf**: YOU PUT THAT FUCKING PHONE DOWN JAEGER.

**VengeanceJaeger**: Done. Anything else you want me to do?

**Windex4lyf**: Can you rub my shoulders? They're sore.

**Halfman**: is muscle soreness a symptom too?

**Smartysmartz**: yep

**Jeantehhorsie**: CAN WE STOP TALKING ABOUT PERODS PEOPLE. WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT ME?!

**Ackerwoman**: I saw Annie eat a bagel yesterday.

**Jeantehhorsie**: No.

**Jeantehhorsie**: we're talking about me.

**Ackerwoman**: sorry.

**Jeantehorsie**: Just don't do it again.

_**Windex4lyf and VengeanceJaeger have signed out.**_

**Halfman: **Aren't you not supposed to have sex on your period?!

**Smartysmartz**: LEVI ISN'T ACTUALLY ON HIS PERIOD! Besides, how do we know they're, "doing it"?

**Reinerdeer**: oh please, it's Levi and Eren. When are they not fucking each other like rabbits?

**Bertibooo**: Reiner has a point.

**Ackerwoman**: STOP TALKING ABOUT EREN LIKE THIS! I'M ALREADY HUNTING THIS SHORTY DOWN.

**Halfman**: you guys are all crazy.

**Halfman**: I love you all so much :,)

**A/N: AND THERE'S ANOTHER CHAPTER! I hope it was okay, and yeah there's a lot of ooc. BUT WHO DOESN'T LIKE AN OOC MIKASA? **

**So, until the next expedition,**

**BAIII :D**

**-Ark**


End file.
